Monday, October 11, 2010

Probably Not in the Dictionary

Last night, the kid's Nana took them to dinner. Which means a drive-thru, fast-food place and...Toys 'R' Us (because, you know, the mall close early on Sunday).

Ben comes home with Lego stuff (big shocker) and Belle? A make-up carrier (which broke within 30 minutes, but that's not the point). She absolutely loved what Nana got her.

She quickly asks for any make up I might have that I'm not using. "I need some, Momma. Now."

Bossy britches.

So I go look (after reminding her how to ask politely) and give her a few things. To her calamity...no mascara.

She puts on some eye shadow. Lipstick. Blush. Then it goes a little something like this:

Belle: So...whadaya think?

Me: Wow...that's some makeup. Probably don't want to use that much though. You're much too beautiful without it. I know you're just playing with it and it's fun. You just don't want to look like a hoochie-mama.

Belle: What's a hoochie-mama again?

Me: A woman who wears too much makeup and not enough clothes. And sometimes just not enough clothes. They're trying to get attention.

Belle: Ohhhhhhh...yeah. Probably wouldn't be pretty.

Ben: Isn't your friend SJ going as a hoochie-mama for Halloween?

Belle: Mmmmm...yeah. I think so. But she's not calling it a hoochie-mama.

Ben: What's she calling it then?

Belle: Just a girl who wears a lot of make-up and not much clothes. I'll let her know what it's called.

Me: Ohhhhhh...you don't need to do that. Everyone has their own name. That's just my name for it. It's not official.

Ben: Sounds like a hoochie-mama to me. I don't like those. <insert prayer here that this is always the case>

Belle: Whatever. I'm gonna be a vampire. But not a hoochie-mama vampire.

Me: Thank goodness. I can't even imagine what that would look like. You probably wouldn't be allowed to go outside in that costume.

Belle: Yeah........


Footnote: Hoochie Mama is in the Urban Dictionary! The last line says: And could get you beat down if you call a woman that. Good to know.

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