IT'S SAFE TO FALL

I absolutely love the Spring and all the excitement it brings. The temperatures rise just enough to make it comfortable. Everything is in bloom. It's like nature is getting a second chance to show what it can do after a hard winter in which it was forced to take cover. The skies are full of life. And when you live in North Texas, part of that 'life' pertain to Spring storms.

I love them. From the light rain we get while the sun is still shining to the angry thunderstorms that pound on the sides of our homes. And then there's tornadoes.

Oh the tornadoes.

I respect the danger of them, but think they are beautiful creations. Don't get me wrong, I despise the destruction they cause and the lives they disrupt. I've been in two tornadoes (strangely enough...both on April 10th, over 20 years apart) and have seen the strength and paths of horrific damage.

Most...and I do mean most...people don't get this about me. They don't understand it. And that's okay with me. There are plenty of things people like and do that I don't understand at all. And I don't force my opinion on them just as I appreciate them not telling me I'm a fool to want to chase a tornado.

It's like I tell my kids...we are all made to be different for a reason. Have different interests. Like different foods, clothes, music...you name it. It's what makes us interesting.

I guess it all comes down to respect.

Respect other people have their own opinions. Even though it's different than what your opinion may be. Respect the fact they may be making a mistake. Sometimes the only way for us to learn is to fall. It teaches us how to get back up.
We all have people in our lives who make decisions we wouldn't make. And somehow, some way...it all works out. We still love each other. We don't issue opinions if not requested. We may think, "Whoaaa...that's definitely not the route I'd take..." but we keep it to ourselves. Why? Simple.

We love these people for a reason. We are happy when they are happy. We are sad when they are sad. We help when we can. We back off when we should. But we never...never...turn our backs on them.

I know I've made plenty of decisions where my friends have thought, "What in the world are you doing, Terri?" but they kept it to themselves. And if those decisions turned out to have poor results, they were there when I needed them. And I do the same for them. I've watched friends make choices that from the outside, seemed so clear to me. I had to assume they, being that they have much more information on their own lives...go figure, were making a decision they thought was the best one at the time. So I stood back. And low-and-behold...many times it was! However, if it turned out to go sour...I was there. No "that's what I figured would happen" just "I'm here for you".

I hope and pray my kids have those kinds of friends in their lives when they need them. Not to mention I hope they are that type of friend to others.
Relationships can be tough. But when you truly care about someone. Love them. It makes it a lot easier to remind yourself, "I love this person for a reason. And part of that reason is because they are different than me. They take chances I wouldn't take and sometimes those chances pay off.".

And when they don't...no big deal. The safety net stretches far and wide. Thankfully.

HABITUAL HONESTY IS IT

Tonight's conversation between me and Shelby. Seems so simple. Sounds incredibly simple. Yet to some, including this almost 8 year old little girl, it still seems like a game they're still trying to figure out the rules to. Or better yet, write their own rules.

There's one set of rules. Again...simple.

Me: So Shelby...please tell me why in the world you have lied about two very simple things today. (those two things being getting in my make-up and brushing her teeth.)

Shelby: Because I didn't want to get in trouble.

Me: And how did that turn out?

Shelby: I got in trouble.

Me: And tell me again...why did you get in trouble?

Shelby: Because I lied. Ooooooh...I guess I'd rather get in trouble for telling the truth.

Me: Remember...the trouble is a LOT less if you tell the truth. Plus, you will be proud of yourself. Are you proud of yourself now?

Shelby: Nooooooooo.

Me: Well I'm proud of you for finally telling the truth. Next time skip the lying part.

Shelby: Deal.


Trust me sweet girl...life will be a whole lot easier this way. The truth is a great habit to get into.

SHOW ME WHAT'CHA GOT GOOGLE ANALYTICS

Someone please tell me why Google is placing all the singles ads on my blog page? Believe me google...I'm NOT interested.

I'm curious though...if I write about certain subjects (which I did not concerning the singles category!), will you place ads concerning those? Let's test this out:

Toenail Fungus

Hemorrhoids

Tongue Piercing

and last, but not least...

Tattoos


Okay...let's see what happens.

CELEBRATING 11 YEARS WITH BEN-THE-BUNNY



Me & sweet Ben

 I couldn't let too many days go by (okay, it's just been one) before I acknowledged the sweetest boy I've ever had the pleasure of knowing had his 11th birthday yesterday.

I can honestly say he has all the characteristics I hope to have when I "grow up". He is on his way to being a great man. A great person.

He has my back always. Wants to be "the man of the house" and is constantly reminded what I need is for him to be my son. To do things young men his age do. And THAT will make me happy.

He has the rest of his life to be "the man". And I have NO DOUBT he will.

He gets his actions have consequences. He always wants to help the underdog. He's gracious, but stands his ground when he needs to do so. He always wants to help and for as long as I can remember, has been a people-pleaser. He wants everyone to be happy.

I'm so incredibly proud to be this young man's mom and he deserves nothing but the best in this world. So for as long as I can, I will do my best to make sure he has it and nothing less.

I love you with everything I am and could possibly hope to be, son. You have made me so proud and continue to do so everyday. I hope when you look back on this time of your life, you will see I tried to do the same for you.

Happy 11th Birthday, Ben! I love you more (don't say it's not possible, because IT IS!).
Mom

WHAT HAPPENED??

I know the colors on the blog don't match. I'm working on a new design so just GIMME SOME TIME!

I'm a busy woman...

CEREBRAL COMPASS CHECK

Last night I was reminded that just as I am quick to forgive, I may need to be even quicker to apologize. Well, when I'm wrong that is. :-)

And while I think I've been good in my life about apologizing when I should (and sometimes even when I shouldn't), I have a tendency to put a protective wall up and analyze the heck out of a few simple words. Take them out of context..."so what you meant by that was ***". When all I really did was either take something out of context, misunderstand it or just not let it go and move on.

I know we are all guilty of this to a degree, but in my quest to be as stress-free and balanced as possible, this is something I definitely want to not just work on, but make a priority.

Thankfully, I have people in my life who are willing to cut me some slack on the occasion I'm not as quick as I should be to say, "I'm sorry" or just move on. (Thank you!)

It's easy to let past circumstances act as a road map your way of thinking. And in my case, being that the road I've been traveling on has been a bit bumpy, I should probably consider a new map, huh?!

I read a quote the other day that basically yelled out my name: "Your freedom lies in your power to control your thoughts."

Ohhhhhhhh yes indeedy it does.

ADJUSTING, ACCEPTING AND LEARNING

It's been an adjustment getting used to the "new" in my life. This is a simple one, but take the appliances in my apartment as an example. I've been spoiled to the, well, more "advanced" ones over the past 10 years or so. And really, the biggest complaint (if you can even call it that) is they are extremely loud. They do a great job, so no problem there. But the A/C, washer/dryer and dishwasher all sound like an F-14 taking flight. Add on top of that the television in the living room will not go loud enough so I can hear it when even one of these appliances comes on and well...you get the picture. Frustrating? Yes. End of the world? Hardly. Even kind of funny, as I know one day I'll look back on it and think, "Remember when we couldn't even hear the tv in the living room?!" Good times... .

The biggest obstacle, as far as the apartment, has been the cooking situation. I'm used to cooking with gas. It's my overall preference. In the past rent house and in the apartment, it's an electric range. Okay...so I get used to it. And the kitchen has enough room for one person at a time to cook. Okay, two if you move around each other like you're on Dancing with the Stars. Otherwise, someones gonna get cut, elbowed, stepped on, something... .

Then there's the grilling outside that I am oh-so-used-to doing when the weather is as beautiful as it has been lately (Editor's Note:  a ceiling fan is needed on my terrace! From the To to the Do...put it on the list!). Burgers. Chicken. Pork chops. You name it...I love grilling. However, we aren't allowed to have "real" grills due to the fire code, so I have this:

~ Scarlett ~

Her name is Scarlett and she's an electric grill. That's right...electric (cord is inside for when it rains!). I have to turn her on High about 30 minutes before I want to start cooking and honestly, she drops about 200 degrees when you open the lid to turn the meat over. However, I will say, she has never produced a bad piece of meat. She does a good job. Maybe has to do with the fact she takes so long, cooks it slowly and evenly. The best thing from her so far, you ask? Beer brined pork chops with special sauce. Yummmmmmmmmm.

Life is proving to be a series of waves of constant adjustments. Choices are vast, but I'm reassured by those I've chosen to trust. They have yet to let me down. And I will not let them down. It's give and take. Push and pull. You get what you give...it's true. Call it karma. Call it luck. Call it God's Hand. I'm in what is sometimes a very scary place in my life, yet more-and-more I'm convinced it will all work out and I'll have everything I ever needed and nothing I would have even thought to ask for.

Good thing I'm not opposed to adjusting. If I weren't, it would be a very long life!

Plus, so far, I've adjusted for the good. And I've learned you should never be afraid of change. You may lose something good; but may end up gaining something better. Some of it's scary, but I refuse to live a life in fear. So from appliances to whatever...you have to face it head-on. Eyes wide open. Heart wide open. Head in check. It's the only way.

Always remember and never forget:
I asked for strength and
God gave me difficulties to make me strong.
I asked for wisdom and
God gave me problems to solve.
I asked for prosperity and
God gave me brawn and brains to work.
I asked for courage and
God gave me dangers to overcome.
I asked for patience and
God placed me in situations where I was forced to wait.
I asked for love and
God gave me troubled people to help.
I asked for favors and
God gave me opportunities.
I received nothing I wanted
I received everything I needed.
My prayers have all been answered.

NEVER SAY NEVER

"Have you heard that new Maroon 5 song?"....no I hadn't. So of course I go to trusty YouTube and investigate.

Ummm....wow. If all the onlookers are real vs. staged for the video...it took some major kahonies to make it. Just sayin'...

TO MORE THAN I CAN BE

"You haven't been writing much lately...what's up with that?"

The last week of my life has been a blur of sorts. Only one other time in my adult life have I had such an emotionally exhausting time that actually caused physical pain. Sounds all "drama-like", but I'm being totally serious. It's just how I carry my stress. I know. Not smart.

In the midst of all the stress, I told Ang that it was strange, but I've never felt as close in my walk with Christ as I have lately. Not just this past week, but more like the past one or two months. I can point to a couple things I know caused it, but am astutely aware of the things I can't see or touch which are also pushing me along this path.

One thing I can point to is a daily devotional given to me by my boss, who also happens to be a friend. It's called Jesus Calling and it's amazed me at just how on-point it is. Every day.

Another is the family and friends I am blessed to have as my support system. They stay remarkably positive. They aren't around me to stir the pot and make my stress even greater. Instead, they are here asking, "How are you today? Is there anything I can do for you?" (this has turned into an almost daily text from Ang!). Or texts and phone calls just checking in. If I tell them of specific stresses, they don't speak negatively...they build me up.

And it's because of these people around me I **finally** heard something God was trying to tell me. (And I've gotta say, it used to take me a LOT longer to hear him, so I consider it taking me only a week to be a triumph of sorts!).

As I mentioned, last week was...well...horrible. One person in particular had it as their M.O. to make my life as difficult as possible. She has been in the driver's seat regarding this particular part of my life for quite some time and seemed determined to harass me about the control she had over it.

It put so much stress in my life, I had a difficult time eating. Sleeping. Started grinding my teeth around the clock. The back spasms returned and migraines commenced. My body housed all the stress instead of handing it over to the Only One who could help.

This weekend, my parents called and asked to know this person's name. "Why?" I asked. "So we can pray specifically for her." I said fine...go ahead. Won't do any good. She's full of hate. And gave them her name.

Another friend asked the same thing. My response was similar, though I was intrigued at the same question happening twice.

All last week as I tried to get past the stress, I heard Ang in my head saying, "We need to pray for her". It's Ang's voice I heard because she almost ALWAYS says this when someone is causing problems. I'm the one cussing them. She's the one praying for them.

So after those three remarkably similar scenarios played out...He chose to hit me over the head this morning on my way to work because I simply was not listening to Him. I was taking it all on myself.

While driving, I started thinking about my work day and my mind went to, "I wonder what she's going to hit me with today. She hit me with something every dang day last week. Why should today be any different?". My head almost immediately started hurting. Back spasms started. It's at that point I decided, "No...I can't have another week like I did last week" and I turned it on KCBI (Christian Talk Radio).

Jack Graham was on and literally as soon as I pushed the button on my radio, I hear his voice say, "Love our enemies? How in the world is that possible? Well...it's not because we are human and to love our enemies we need Christ. Only He can help us love our enemies. He never gives you a command he won't enable you to do".

I finally heard Him. It all came together.

I no more wanted to pray for this woman who has caused me so much grief, stress and pain. And He knew I couldn't. So He had others do it for me. But after that, I did it. I really tried for my heart to be all in it, but my emotion from the last week blocked it from being 100%, I'm fairly certain.

And while I didn't see the results I was hoping for today, I did feel relief emotionally. And for that, I'm grateful.

While I'm tired of hearing things like, "He gives the greatest challenges to the strong" I think I have figured out that if I am in fact strong, as people seem to see me, it's because of my support system. Their prayers lift me up. Help my kids. Help me try and be a good mom/friend. Help me hear Him when He is talking directly to me and I fail to listen.

Always remember and never forget: Some people talk about finding God...as if He could get lost.

For my family and friends...thank you for continually raising me high enough to see all the wonderful things around me that I fail to see when I look down instead of up.