ARMS ARE GETTIN' TIRED, SO I'M LETTIN' GO

I'm going to say something "we women" never really like to admit.

We like to be taken care of.

Let me elaborate.

We don't want everything done for us. We don't expect to be treated as someone incapable of doing things. But sometimes...just sometimes, we like to be treated like something more amazing than we actually are. A queen. A rock star. The only person in the world. Here's the kicker...all without having to be told to do so. Surprise us. Make the plans. Plan an escape. (And please...please...do not use the lame excuse of, "If I planned something you may not like it so it's just easier to ask you..." Pfffffffft! Note the word "easy".)

It's something I have definitely had a tough time admitting. Whenever asked in the past by a man, "You need some help?" the answer was always an instinctive, "No...I got it." And you know why? Because I didn't feel like they should even have to ask. Just do it! Did I just get back from the grocery store and have a truck-load of groceries? Yes...help me. Of course.

I'm cooking dinner, helping kids with homework, phone is ringing..."Can I do anything?"...Really? Is that a legitimate question? Of course you help!

But I guess that's where assuming gets you. Life isn't a game, so we shouldn't assume the other person knows what we need or want. There are no pre-printed rules. No step-by-step guide.

So let me now be clear. Sometimes I need help. I can do plenty of things by myself, but if you are a man...go the step further and be a gentleman. I don't give a rats ass if you were raised that way or not. Step beyond your little solar system world rotating around your head and wake up.

All of this stems from a simple task yesterday.

I called Ben down, as I always do, when I pulled in with groceries yesterday and as soon as he got down there he asked, "Why doesn't Shelby have to help?" He was playing a video game and didn't want to stop what he was doing.

My answer, "Because you and I can get this in one trip and because I asked you to do it. Ben...this is part of not just being a good person, but also being a gentleman. And you need to get into the HABIT of being one. If you see someone who needs help with something, drop what you are doing and help. You can go right back to doing whatever it was, but it's more important to help someone. You never know what just the smallest amount of effort can mean to someone else."

"Yes ma'am, mom. You're right. Thanks ... because I do want to be that kind of man. I mean I will be." then smiles really big, proud and stands up tall next to me to remind me once again he's close to surpassing me in height. Not far at all.

He's such an amazing young man. He went on to actually apologize for a word he used the other day (won't get into it...another time, another post,but no it wasn't a 'cuss' word...just not a politically correct one that he'd heard another adult use so he thought it was okay) and how he basically said he thinks it's the little things that say a lot about a person. "I can't believe I even said it! I knew it would hurt someone's feelings. I'm glad I said it in front of you first, mom."

I couldn't agree more, Ben.

So I'll quit pretending I don't need help and you start taking the reigns on certain things. As much fun as the monkey bars are, sometimes you just have to let go and drop in order to move on.