Embracing the Detour

My visitor, the possum, showed up again at 3 a.m. this morning. Again, Scout starts the barking. Inside, Duke is howling. And I...well I snapped a little.

Looking back on it, no it's not just about the possum. It's about everything. It's about all the responsibility I have and at 3 a.m. this morning, I had a little Pity Party. Fact is, as much as I may not appreciate or like all the cards I've been dealt, in the clear of the day I know it could be worse. I know plenty of others have it worse.

This is all part of being an adult. I can't turn back time, but I can choose the way I deal with the present (obviously not very well at 3 a.m. with two dogs demanding my attention), but I have choices.

When we come to forks in the road, it's difficult. If one path were certain, there wouldn't be a fork...now would there?! It would be more like a turn!

So at said fork, I can head toward the sign saying "Detour" or the one saying "Wrong Way".

That's it. There isn't one that says, "Clear road ahead!". I know there may be bumps down the road saying "Detour". There may be broken bridges or twists and turns, maybe even some debris in the road...but I'd MUCH rather take this route. The "Wrong Way" is self-descriptive, right? You know what you're gonna get. At least you know it won't be positive.

Regarding the possum, I guess I need to do what a friend suggested ..."If I were you, I'd build it a little house in the backyard and just let it entertain you."

So, welcome to my world possum. I'll try not to go postal on you. Enjoy the fig trees. They are obviously why you are here. Maybe you've got babies to feed. I could set a trap from Animal Control, but then what if she is a momma and I take her away from her babies?

If she's willing to travel every night from wherever she's traveling from just to get some figs, I can't put up a "Wrong Way" sign in her path.

No...it's not just about the possum. It's about being on the "Detour" path. And really... who'd of thought this nocturnal critter would bring a little bit of clarity? I only know one person. And he's grinning ear-to-ear right now.

Momma Bears, Dogs and Possums Don't Mix

It's a night-time ritual for at least one of the dogs to wake me up anytime between two and four in the morning. The door to the backyard faces a corner of the house and around that corner is a pitch-black area which houses the air conditioning units. It has always made me nervous because it's a "perfect" spot for someone to hide out. Yes, I keep locks on the gates. But, let's face it...people who are up to no good aren't deterred by a locked gate. They break into doors and windows...why in the world wouldn't they climb over a fence!?

It's been making me even more nervous as of late because I can't just let the dogs out. Duke can not go out with out me. His back legs are useless so I have to wrap a towel around his belly to make a type of "sling" to walk him around. I have to leave the door unlocked, obviously, so I can get back in. But it's never far from my thought process (being the Momma Bear I am) that if someone were to venture into my backyard, I would be in a very vulnerable position and more importantly...my kids would be in one. Door unlocked. They're sleeping. You see where a mom's mind goes.

So last night when I opened the door to let Scout out and heard a loud rustling around the corner, about 5-feet away, then a "BAM" into the fence that immediately made the fence start shaking...I flew into the house, locked the door and left poor Scout out there to fend for herself. She, of course, had started barking *loudly* as soon as all this happened. And hadn't stopped as of yet.

I peaked through the blinds and saw nothing. I ran to close the door to the room the kids were sleeping in. I peaked out the window upstairs that looks down on that area of the yard. I still didn't see anything and I'm shaking. But Scout still had not stopped barking. In fact...it had gotten a bit more intense.

Since she hadn't stopped barking and I couldn't see who or what she was barking at, I assumed they were hiding behind the fence. The only place I couldn't see.

And for the first time in my life I called 911.

I explained the situation. No...I hadn't actually seen anyone. Yes...that is my dog outside who is still barking. Yes...she's big. A pointer. Yes, in fact...she is in full point and has now backed up about five feet.

The 911 operator assures me I've done the right thing to call since I can't see anything, have two sleeping children in the house and a dog outside who is STILL barking and not breaking her point. She says an officer is in the area and driving around with his lights off. When his back-up arrives, one will park down the street and the other in the alley. Then they will walk the perimeter. She tells me not to be surprised to see lights shining outside the house.

In the meantime, I go back upstairs to look out the window again hoping whoever it is has moved locations and maybe I can spot them.

I do.

I spot the biggest possum I've ever seen in my life who is perched and frozen on top of the fence. "It's not moving!" I tell the operator.

"And it won't...it's what they do."

"Ahhh...hence the phrase 'playing possum'."

I meet the officers out front and point out where the 'suspect' is. They too are surprised at the size of this thing. We concur maybe it's a momma-to-be. Who knows. They ask if I want them to try and scare it off.

Really? Ummm...no that's okay. I'd like to encounter that thing in my backyard again when I have to take Duke out after all this commotion. YES! Make it go away!

All of this to say, I now have two scheduled trips this weekend: 1) Lowes for a security light to install on that side of the house; and, 2) The gun range.

And another thought enters my mind...that would be a good name for a restaurant: The Fat Possum. I'm just sayin...

My Little Man

We went to the pool today to have a little "reunion" with some of the kids friends. As soon as we got there, it was apparent there were more of Ben's friends than Shelby's. I thought...oh boy. Shelby's gonna pout while Ben runs off and plays.

What happened next both shocked me and made my heart feel as if someone was crumpling it like a piece of paper.

Instead of going to play with his friends, Ben stuck by me.

"What are you doing?"

"I'll just stay with you until you go in."

"Why?"

He *loves* playing with his friends. Always has. Actually, this kid is known for introducing himself to kids he doesn't know and has always become fast friends with everyone he meets.

"I don't know... . Do you not want me with you?"

"Honey...of course I do. But we came so you could see your friends. What's stopping you?"

I never could get a straight answer. I have suspicions of why. Part of it involves the kids were already playing and maybe he felt a little left out (though this is just NOT Ben) to he feels very protective over me lately. Maybe he thought I'd be sitting alone and didn't want me to be. But even when I sat by the other moms...he stayed there with me.

Could be he was just out of sorts a little. He warmed up later on and did play with them some. But the way the day started off hurt my heart in a profound way. He's always been such a happy, care-free kid and while I KNOW he's going to grow up...I don't want him to lose that happiness in him that's always been there.

Watching them get older is both thrilling and painful. Especially my sweet boy who wants to take on so much. He wants to "be the man". Which I suppose I should appreciate to a degree, but all I want him to do is be a 10 years old. He will have to be a man soon enough and I know he will relish the role.

But for now, I'm going to have to try and emphasize...somehow...of just how great of a 10 year old he is. And *that* is precisely what I need him to be. My little boy for just awhile longer.

Equivalent Retaliation

I've had different responsibilities added to my job lately. They're quite awesome as they are ones I am able to do after the kids go to bed. So I've been staying up pretty late getting these things done and spending more time with the kids during the day.

I've always been more of a night owl than a morning person anyway. Always. I know. I know. If I got into the pattern of going to bed earlier I'm sure I'd become a morning person. Well, not so much sure as probably. Anyway...not the point.

Point is I've always kind of had my bedtime rituals. Everyone does, right? One thing mine has *always* included is my Pooey. It's a really small pillow my mom gave me when I was a baby. Maybe I couldn't say "pillow", I don't know. I've had two Pooey's as I loved the first one to death (I still have it somewhere). The second one is one I made for someone else who didn't appropriately appreciate it :-) so I reclaimed it. I sleep with it every night.

I don't travel with it for fear of leaving it somewhere though. Can't even imagine... .

My sister asked me once when I was growing up, "What are you going to do when you get married? You think your husband is going to want that thing around?" I answered emphatically, "If he loves me, he won't care." No way was I getting rid of Pooey.

So I get why Shelby loves her Pink Puppy so much. Turns out. She gets it too.

Last night, after taking her Pink Puppy...seems the little rascal went and took my Pooey. I didn't discover this until very late since I was working until all hours.

Once I did discover it missing, I got confused. Actually looked at Scout and thought she had maybe taken it somewhere. Poor dog...always gets blamed. Then, I heard some rustling upstairs. Belle had gotten up to go to the bathroom. I went up to check on her and while there asked her, "Have you seen Pooey?"

The look said it all. A little grin said "yes" even though the voice said, "no".

And for some reason, I just started laughing. Then she started laughing. "Shelby! I can't believe you!"

Maybe I should've been mad but it seriously cracked me up. I have no idea where she hid it since she appeared with it saying, "Is this what you're looking for?". I told her, "Oh girl....your treading on dangerous ground."

We laughed so hard and yes, I know, it probably encouraged her to do it again. But sometimes, you just have to enjoy the moment for what it is.

And for her, it was, "You hit me where it hurts...I'll hit you in the same place."

So my mom hat came off and my love hat went on. And a lesson was learned. From now on when I take her Pink Puppy...I'll hide Pooey first.